Saturday, October 22, 2016

Thinking about user accounts

So far we just walk in and chat.  While this is ok it would be better if we all could have an account.  Why?  Because having an account opens the door to having features that only account holders have.  Do we have any such features as yet?  No, but then again, step one is to have accounts.  Everything else will follow.

Using 3rd Party Authentication

My current thought is to use a third party service that will authenticate users.  What does this mean?  Have you ever been to a site to buy something and they say create an account or login using your google account or login using your Facebook account?  When a site uses google or Facebook to authenticate they are effectively using third parties.

Let's look at some terminology here:
Authentication: The act of verifying you are who you say you are.
Authorization:  What are you allowed to do on this site.  Chat, be a mod, be a room owner etc.

Authentication handled by a third party is safer for us all.  I never get to see your passwords or your information,  For example if you authenticate against Facebook all I get is a yes or no from Facebook on whether your username and password you provided to Facebook are valid or not.  This way none of your passwords are ever stored on Deviantlives servers.  No one can hack in and peek and steal what is your private information.  Once a third party service returns a successful authentication by you, I can then say aha!!!  These are the chat names registered to you, these are the rooms you can chat in, you are a mod in the following rooms, and you own the following rooms.  See where I am going with this? :-)

This is also good for the site.  If any user indulges in illegal activities, its now easier (not easy) to track them.  I really hope this situation never arises.

More on this later.......

Sunday, June 19, 2016

My Choice....

An interesting video, a remake of another but this time from a woman's perspective.  Yes, we all have a choice.  Use it.  Don't live in fear and and don't let another take this choice away from you.  Even the D/s lifestyle is about choices.  If not, its abuse not a lifestyle.  Think about it.  Make your choice. It's your choice.

Monday, June 6, 2016

her demons

Let us wrap our arms around you
Little girl
We know you're feeling alone again
Little girl
It feels like no one loves you
Little girl
But we do

We're the demons in your head
Little girl
We're the monsters under your bed
Little girl
We love you when no one else is around
Little girl
Let us hold you.

- Lithium Doll

Wednesday, May 25, 2016

A dog's life...

Always something different and interesting out there.  I have heard of furries before.  Seen many adopt that lifestyle or fantasy on Second Life.  This is something way more real.  Have a read:

Friday, May 6, 2016

The First Blog is the Deepest

My introduction to the "lifestyle" was I suppose fairly ordinary in a very extraordinary  way.   I had been in a terrible marriage where I had neither control nor affection and after many years, I escaped and moved out of state where I met and became friends with My hairdresser.  We started talking about "stuff" back and forth and after some time, she told Me that she was a slave for her Husband...  How interesting I thought... I needed to go on a quest to find out what all that was all about, being naturally curious and all *S*

After knowing her a while *but not too terribly much longer* I started getting invites to dinner and evenings.  Well we played a little, nothing went too far a whole lot of suggestive conversation maybe kisses and gropes.  One day.. The Husband came into My office and informed Me that it was going to be his wife's birthday soon and she had mentioned to Him that what she wanted for her birthday was for Him to ask Me to come and help teach her how to submit.  Who was I to deny a friends birthday wishes.

When I arrived, she was making dinner we drank some wine smoked some weed ate talked and relaxed.  I don't really remember exactly how it started, but it came down to she was whimpering and trying to get outta being  punished by a riding crop.. I told her she was being silly and that I would teach her how a proper slave was to take punishment * I have no idea exactly what I was saying or doing but the next thing I knew I was bare assed up clenching on to the end of the coffee table just being beaten *it was magical* I was hooked... It was the most erotic thing ever.

Well this naughtiness went on of over the course of several months.. We got up to ALL kinds of really outlandish fun.. Sadly.. I ended up with a giant promotion at work and had to move.. It was only an hour away but as all good things have their time.. the time had come for that  delicious relationship to just fade into a wonderful memory.  I had become a submissive!!!

Well... That was enough to make Me know for sure that I was done with the "usual" fucky sucky usual sexy time... I needed more.. So.. being in a small town in a really visible job, I did what everyone else on the planet does... I went on line.. * Treasure trove* I met all KINDS of different people from ALL over the world.   Well what was astounding to Me... was that All the "Doms" I met.. none of them really "got" it.. there was always something missing .. there were those who thought a 46 minute spanking without any imagination was where it was.. For those of you who think it does.. it doesn't, but that's a different topic for a different day.

Well what can a girl to do??  Do it Herself that's what.  I decided that it was My civic duty to educate  "doms" in the proper training to be a real Dom.  Well that idea kinda snowballed and It ended up with Me quitting My job and going to live in Europe for a few months just to abuse a man slave * I kinda HAD to go do that*

That was 17 years ago now that I have been back from Europe I switched from sub to Domme out of sheer necessity and now I am wonderful with being what I truly am.  I have tried to switch back.. I have even tried to play switch.. Epic fail!!!  I am a Domme thru and thru and I wouldn't have it any other way!!!

More soon...

Best switches


Thursday, May 5, 2016

Things and stuff...a small glimpse into my life

For those that don't know me, I'm Lithium Doll, or LD. I've gone by many names in the past, but at present, and hopefully for a long future to come, I will still be LD.  

I wasn't always a submissive. I've never lived my life as a Dominant or a submissive. Back in 1997, I started out as a regular type of chatter like most of us have. But as the years passed, my love of learning and curiosity grew. I dove into the world of BDSM. I felt strong back then. I felt that I could be anything I wanted to be. And I thought, I felt at the time, I needed to "be with someone". I felt that void in my life start to twirl and create. Again I learned as much as I could about being a Domme, or a Mistress. It was exciting. I felt even more powerful than I ever could imagine. I played with people from all over the globe. Most were just casual sex, some, when in the mood, were BDSM scenes. And I still learned something new every day.

I had both men and women in my collar at various stages of my chatting life. Some I had really strong feelings for, some were more of a fling or a "just because". As well as friends in the BDSM community. Some of them as well have gone and left, some disappearing or dead. 

Again I still had a lot to learn. Fast forward to make a long story short, after another handful of failed online relationships and heartaches, I changed my path to that of a submissive. It was were I felt I needed to be. To fill another aching void in my life I didn't particularly  know was there. 

While being open with myself to others, I met a Man. We played a few times but never really talked about personal things. Until one day He disappeared. I didn't know where He had gone until He showed up again almost a year later. We talked on yahoo, talked about everything. What excited us, our dreams, and our personal lives. And we grew into something that both excited me and scared the hell out of me all at once. There was a lot of trial and errors in our relationship as Master and submissive, as any relationship goes thru. He guided me and taught me and was as patient as He could be with me. 

And while He professed His love for me, I was still seeing other people. I don't know why I didn't stop seeing them, to be honest. Maybe it was because they gave me something He didn't yet, or didn't know how. Maybe it was because i was addicted to the attention. Or the pretty words on a screen. I should have stopped and realized sooner that I had something really great with Him. Something that could have lasted to eternity. But knowing myself as I do, I messed everything up. I made the biggest mistake of my life. I hurt the only Man I ever truly loved. How does that tie into anything BDSM, you ask? It ties into it all because that was the life I had with Him. Granted most of it was online, those feelings were real. They still are real. 

He never left me. He stayed by my side, day after day thru His hurt and His pain. When anyone else would have left me for forgotten and gone, He stayed there. After that... after everything I put this Man thru, He never left. I went from precious babygirl, to sitting on her Daddy's lap and getting things my way, to starting at the bottom (to me) a slave to her Master, her Sir. A bottom slave where I've never been before. I tried so hard to be what He wanted me to be. I pushed myself to do the things a "babygirl" normally wouldn't have done, just to please Him. I didn't want Him to leave me either, call it selfishness, but I was in love with Him. 

It wasn't working. I did everything He asked of me, but His hurt and His anger were still there. He said that I wasn't a slave. It's not in me to be a slave. Maybe He was right. But I still have to learn, still always so much to learn when ones heart and soul yearn for something that just feels is right out of grasps reach. You want to know about emotions in BDSM? There are tons.

With failing, with hurting Someone so deeply, with having a remorse so deep, I have learned compassion. I have learned respect. I have learned humility. I have learned honesty. I have learned loyalty. I have learned devotion. And I have learned to love as deep as the ocean itself. He is my world. One day I know there will no longer be a Him and I. But in order for me to have learned, I had to make mistakes. Mistakes that put me into my own personal hell. Mistakes that, in any other lifetime i would have brushed off and moved on and laughed at the claims that i was a monster. Some would say what I did DID make me a monster. Made me a bad person. But I'm really not. I am just a human that made mistakes. And in order for those mistakes to be forgiven, I will keep learning, keep devoting myself, keep trying to make up for every bad thing I've done for 100 lifetimes. 

I have been called "unlovable" and "unteachable". I guess I still had something to prove to myself.

I am human, just like everyone else. But in that knowledge, we, as individuals, look and find or search for only what we, ourselves, know what's in our own hearts.

Can You see her, Sir?

can You see her, Sir?  as she lays on the bed before You…

naked and trembling, excited and nervous, as she spreads her legs open wide to You…

her small hands beginning to knead firming nipples, swelling around the bars You love to torment, her dark eyes peering up to Yours…

can You see her, Sir?  as You sit at the end of the bed, watching her begin to perform for You…

fingers tugging on the piercings…  her lil whimpers and moans soft, as her eyes flutter shut…

beginning to lose herself in the play, her body beginning to respond to her primal urgings, as You sit there, silently watching…

can You see her, Sir?  as her hands begin to drift down her stomach, the fire burning deep inside all for You…

caressing up and down open thighs, trembling in excitement,  tiny fingertips flickering over swelling cunt lips already damp with her need… 

her hips rising to meet those reaching hands, already beginning that fucking motion that is all for You…

pinching the swollen clit, her moans growing as she gives in to her need, her fingers wet from the seeping need leaking from her…

can You see her, Sir?  as two fingers slide in deep, beginning to fuck that wet cunt that belongs to You…

can You smell her need, her wanton lust, as her fingers stroke in and out, fucking herself…  while other fingers tug and pinch at her rock hard nipples…

can You hear her whimpered pleas for Your use of her?   fucking her as she becomes the wild beast she is for You… writhing and lost in the wanton lust burning out of control in her belly, her sounds guttural, soft then loud, growing with intensity as she fucks her leaking cunt for You…

can You see her, Sir?  ramming her fingers in deep and hard…  begging You to take her now…please?

her hips rising faster, thrusting to You, her thighs trembling, her body quaking from the inside out, waiting for that one word, that whispered command that she responds to so easily…  Your voice in total control of her, holding her as if she were in chains…

her body arching with each deep thrust of her fingers…  tears of frustration sliding down her face as she waits, quivering on the edge… that brink she rides for You… caught between the agony – the pain – of riding that edge, and the ecstacy of giving You Your desire…

can You see her, Sir?  giving herself to You?  offering You everything and all? 

can You see her, Sir?  as she cumms, long and hard, screaming out Your name, again and again, as she gives over to the ecstacy…  her lust gushing from her, hot and sticky sweet… the smell of her filling the air… weeping with utter joy and happiness, as she sees the glimmer of a smile on Your face…

can You see her, Sir?  Your slut, Your wild fuckbeast, Your cherished pet….

can You see her, Sir?  She is Yours…

Wednesday, May 4, 2016

an introduction...

Thank You, SH, for asking me to contribute to this blog.  For those who do not know me, I am dh, and I am a real life submissive (slave, actually, but for the purposes of this blog, submissive will do).  I met SH a few months ago, and when He asked if I would contribute to this blog, I said yes.  I actually find it hard to talk about myself, but for my first article, I do think an introduction is in order.

I started chatting about 15 years ago, after my last divorce.  I had no clue about computers or chat or anything really, so when someone I met on yahoo chat told me about a larger chat site, I was intrigued.  For the first year or so, I spent all my chat time in the cyber rooms.  And boy, were my eyes opened wide.  I had no clue that there were people out there who thought of sex in so many diverse, perverted, and yes, deviant ways (and I mean all that in the most positive way).  I did not know what bdsm was, or that all my deep feelings concerning submission and giving myself to a Man completely was normal – that I was not some kind of freak of nature or a monstrosity or worse.  I roamed from room to room, looking for…..something, I did not know what.  Then one day, I met a Man who would change the course of my life forever.

I was sitting in a room, not talking to anyone, when this stranger said hello to me. When He did,  something inside said talk to Him.  We began chatting, casually at first.  Within 45 minutes, I was asking if we could talk on the phone.  I could sense the power in Him just from His voice.  I could sense how this Man was real, that He could change my life and make me into something special.  He knew what and who I was from the answers I gave to His questions.  And when He asked me how much I loved pain, well… whole insides turned to aching fire.  I’ve never before had such an intense profound reaction to someone. 

When we talked about that day, and we did many times, He always said I challenged Him to show me something I’d never seen before.  I don’t remember that, but I am sure it is true, for He did show me something I’d never seen before – the joys of pain, the joys of being controlled, and eventually,  the joys of being owned.  He always was completely honest to me, open to a fault, cruel and relentless, even tender at times.  But most of all, He controlled me as no Man ever had before or since then.  He taught me so much, taught me who and what I am, taught me that there is nothing more powerful or exhilarating to a Man than a true submissive who will give her complete self to Him, freely and willingly. 

I learned that lesson well, that my gifts were a joy to behold.  Since then, I have had a few online Masters, another real life Master (who I may get around to writing about), have lived these last three years plus uncollared and free.  But I have never forgotten that first One who taught me that there is freedom in the bdsm lifestyle, even when one is chained and owned – especially when one is chained and owned, for in giving of oneself totally, that is when one can finally be free.

More to come…..


Is deviant the right choice for naming this site and blog

When creating this site I liked the name Deviant Lives.  To me it stood for something out of the norm, something different.  But as I give this more thought I realize that yes people are different and perhaps the term deviant is fine but then isn't everyone a deviant?  I mean, think about it.  In terms of life style preferences.  There are religious folks.  But then no religions like each other and each thinks the other is a deviant, abnormal, an infidel?  Within religions there are groups, factions, sects, whatever.  Step out of religion and enter culture.  There is no conformity there either.  Most modern societies are opening up to the notion of accepting these differences in each other and in fact embracing them as a symbol of strength.

Certain lifestyle choices, sexuality, don't necessarily get that much of an acceptance.  Why?  Because we like to keep our sexual side private?  I can get that.  But why not use the word different instead of deviant?  Or why add a negative connotation to the word deviant?

So here we are going to look at being deviant as a positive attribute.  I am a deviant and you are a deviant, because we think out of the box, because we think different, because we are not sheep who blindly follow some so called "norm" for how we are to behave and act.

Is this blog going to be focused just on sexuality?  Hell no.  I hope not.  Let's see where this goes.